Faith Vs. Feeling As I Look Ahead

Well, it is the last day of 2008. This year has been a struggle for me in accepting change and loss.

When I began this blog, on my first post I ended with this goal: "A new journey to a place of vulnerability with those who might be interested..." I think I haven't been vulnerable enough.

This is supposed to be about removing my masks, isn't it?

It's easy to talk about the life of my father in the spring, but not about the ache in my heart that finally came crashing through on Christmas Eve...
...or of the pride of Emma's high school graduation and new venture in her life as she's off to college. Expressing my sense of solitude with her absence (and the myriad of friends in our home on a constant basis, bringing with them all the sounds of laughter)...the quietness isn't something I've talked about. Then there is the change in how I spend my days. It is exciting to work with children I've grown to love from The Gap School, and yet I haven't mentioned how much I miss my RHS kids and the hole they've left.

This has been a year of profound change for me. I confess I feel unexcited about this upcoming year, and even fearful at times about what could happen. The Man About The House and I have spent this past week talking about faith in God to take care of the future and entrusting to Him 2009. At what point do I let go of feelings and rely on my faith in God that has seen me through each moment of my life?

I think that is my goal as this year ends: to focus more on the finisher of my faith, and leave what is behind.

God's best to you in 2009

In The Bleak Midwinter

In the bleak midwinter
Frosty wind made moan,
Earth stood hard as iron,
Water like a stone;
Snow had fallen, Snow on snow,
In the bleak midwinter
Long, long ago.

Our God, heav'n cannot hold Him
Nor earth sustain:
Heav'n and earth shall flee away
When He comes to reign:
In the bleak midwinter
A stable-place sufficed
The Lord, God Almighty
Jesus Christ.


Angels and arch-angels may have gathered there,
Cherubim and seraphim thronged the air:
But only His mother in her maiden bliss
Worshiped the Beloved with a kiss.

What can I give Him, poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd I would bring a lamb;
If I were a wise man I would do my part;
Yet what I can I give Him

Give Him my heart.

Merry Christmas, with love,

Garland and Shari

Katy, Emma, Laura

Nine Years Pass By Too Quickly

Happy Anniversary to my sweet husband, Garland!

Hats off to the Man for helping me rear three daughters through open houses at school, birthdays, new boyfriends, old boyfriends, proms, graduations, student drivers, dresses and dances, loft-building projects....


....for still surviving hot flashes, erratic thyroid, job changes, empty nesting about to begin, The Next Food Network Star, good-byes needing to be said, chick flicks, sleeping from the day's stresses a little too early, too-long-road trips....


Here's to my best friend now and forever. I'd love another 90 years with you if it were possible!

New Compassions

Typically as I fly through the local grocery, I am squeezing this all-too-often errand into a busy day. I know the fastest cashiers. I am especially particular about who packs my bags for me. Two men are my favorites and are great in protecting produce and organizing my groceries. There are some baggers that I have typically in the past stood in a longer line to avoid. Publix is a large provider of jobs for challenged adults. In theory I have admired the store and the employees for their support of this community, but in reality haven't liked to subject my delicate peaches and eggs to the higher odds and risk of damage.

I am completing my first month as the Music Specialist at The Gap School, and have been personally faced with my bias and own lack of genuine acceptance. I have grown to adore the children I teach, and now look at the Publix employees with similar needs in a different light.

Here are some faces of my really special kids:

Jade, age 8

Marla, age 8

Ethan, age 7

Jade and Tavin, age 6

Churchill, Abbe, Ethan, Jade, Tavin: The 1st grade team "Road Runners"

Arie, age 15

Nicholas, age 10

Zach and Wesley, age 10

Max, Evan, Victoria, ages 16, 14, 15

Merik, age 13

Jake and Thomas, age 12